Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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