'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
