its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I touched a dick in church today
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
