so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I will pee on everything he values.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize