This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
