Sry I called you an 8
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize