I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
