Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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