The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
