the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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