you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
