shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
