I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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