ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
