"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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