I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
