Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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