he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
