filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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