STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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