I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
