I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
