I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
