I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize