Dual....:-)
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
