You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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