it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
