i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'm jealous of your bromance
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
