How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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