the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
