Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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