I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
