i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
did you just send me my own nude
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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