honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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