Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Randomize
