Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
