I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
