She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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