She's JV to your varsity
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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