So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
