I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
