I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Screwed.edu
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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