The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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