Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
how does that bad decision feel?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
