you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
