You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
