Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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