oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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