I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
