You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize